I’ll be the first to tell you that I’m a control freak over my own life. I find myself spending most of my time planning out my future instead of enjoying the beauty of each day. There’s always something to ponder! Thoughts pop in my mind so freely that sometimes I don’t even know how I start thinking of them in the first place. What’s for dinner? Any tests this week? What are you going to do for that project? Have you started thinking about applying for jobs yet? My mind is like a never-ending stream of a to-do list. I try so hard to be able to predict and control circumstances in my life. But at the end of the day, it’s all a discombobulated mess. It is then that I realize that I am not the one in charge of my life—God is.
I remember three years ago when I was preparing to come to college. Like any other senior in high school, I expected my senior year to be laid back, full of laughs and fun. As it turns out, it was a challenge. What started out as a fairly simple surgery on my hip and leg turned out to be much more complicated because I had to have two more. I spent many sleepless nights wondering how I was going heal in time for college which was only five months away. I felt like I didn’t have any control over anything. I was in a TON of pain from the surgeries, so that surely didn’t help me feel any better about the situation. I was truly at the end of my rope.
One day, I was in my bed while my body was continuing healing. Once again, worries were swirling around in my head. Was I going to be able to make it to college? What if I was still in pain when I got there? I just remember closing my eyes and praying to God. I said, “God, if you help me heal from this surgery, I will go to college to make you proud. I’m tired of worrying. So I am letting you take the wheel on this.”
From then on, I changed my whole attitude about the situation. I made up my mind that I was not gonna worry because I handed it over to God. Long story short, I was able to make it to college that August! The Lord definitely held up His end of the deal, and I held up mine too because I put all my trust in Him. 🙂 That time in my life was the hardest thing I’d ever been through, but it also was the most beneficial because I learned how important it is to let God have control of my life, instead of me. I’m just in the passenger seat!
These days we are encouraged to go ninety-to-nothing in our daily lives, and because of that we fail to see the true beauty of it. We focus on achieving long-term goals instead of enjoying the little things that happen. We long to have control instead of giving it to God.
I am in no way a pro at this topic. I have to remind myself daily that God is in charge. It is so true that life can for sure be a scary thing. But on the bright side, we don’t have to worry about how it will turn out because God is at the wheel— and we are all just the passengers. 🙂